Day 08 — A Picture that Makes You Laugh
This picture is funny on several levels. It’s one grizzly bear attacking another grizzly bear in a most unconventional way, and that is none other than one of the funniest methods one can lay waste to a man. Now, before I get hate messages regarding my endorsement of prune smacking…I want to go on the record that I am in no way encouraging a regular practice of this act…AND this is only funny if the guy can stand and still has the ability to produce children later in life.
That being said, I confess myself quite giddy when I am fortunate enough to witness the occasional ball bashing. It doesn’t matter what type of man it is, really. Young, old, fat, skinny, geek, jock, knight, ogre, spartan, or coward. The bean-bag crunch discriminates not, as all chaps are rendered incapacitated; a pathetic crumple, clutching at his tenders. It’s a return to the womb - utter helplessness bound into the fetal position.
It gets me every time: I laugh remorselessly.
As a witness, you see it coming, and that makes it a wondrous spectacle to behold. As a guy that has experienced the phenomenon that is acorn-pulverizing, it’s all the sweeter, as I know exactly what will transpire in those brief moments of the event. The first happens naturally for men in most environments: obliviousness (this can be observed at malls, schools, churches, parks, etc.). The calm state of mind is followed by sudden awareness, realization of impact, the futile bracing of said impact (often paired with a sudden inhale and holding of oxygen), the listless crumple, and finally, the whimper.
It is a magnificently bittersweet symphony of anguish.